Worst Assistant Ever

I awake to an alarm buzzing with ferocious intensity. My head pounds harder and harder. I look over at the bed stand and can barely read the clock, 1:03am. It's late, or early...whatever.

I crawl up to a sitting position and yawn as I glance down around at my bare hotel room. I bring up my phone and check for any messages; there are 2 from my boss. I open my voicemail and listen to the first:

"Hey so uh, it's pretty late now and I don't think that this is fair for me, you know? I think it's total bullshit that we have to stay here in this hotel and, and, and, WAIT...for this stupid thing to happen. They should have had the set ready hours ago for me, you know? What are you going to do about this? I suggest you call them and tell them that I am not happy at all with this situation. Call me."


I immediately press 7 and delete it into oblivion. I scroll to message two but hesitate; it's 10 minutes after the first. I slowly press play:


"Hey! What the fuck? Why haven't you picked up your phone? Do you realize who is calling you? For fucksake, pick up the god forsaken phone or I'll beat your balls into oblivion you miserable piece of shit. You're the worst assistant ever. I can't believe that you're sleeping or whatever it is you are doing but I'm not leaving my hotel room until you come here or call me back. It's very late and I'm tired."



I sigh heavily and notice it's 1:11am. I throw my phone across the room. I grab a half empty warm beer from the night stand and chug it's remains, the only way to get a night like this started. Or morning, whatever.